When Things Go Wrong – Important Information for Parents and Carers

Every day, the media has stories about domestic violence, coercive control, and financial abuse, highlighting the urgent need for it to stop. 

In this article, we look at when support workers or other people who are meant to provide care and assistance to individuals with disabilities, become perpetrators of these abuses. This information is confronting for families who rely on another person to ensure the safety and well-being of their loved ones.

It is, however, a topic that needs to be discussed so that people it is happening to don’t think it is their fault or that they are the only person it has happened to.  Only when it is discussed, will people have the confidence to speak out and will we have the chance to stop it from happening.

3 forms of abuse that may occur:

Domestic Violence: The physical harm or threats of harm to a person with a disability by a person they are in a relationship with.

Coercive Control: Tactics used to manipulate or control another person’s actions and decisions. The exertion of undue influence over a person they are supporting or assisting that limits their freedom and autonomy.

Financial Abuse: When the financial resources of a person with a disability are misused or they are taken advantage of.

What to look for:

As parents and caregivers, signs to look for could include:

  • Unexplained injuries 
  • Unexplained changes in behaviour
  • Withdrawal from family or friends
  • Changes in a person’s financial situation without clear explanations
  • Reluctance to speak openly about the people supporting them 

What you can do:

If you have concerns that there may be abuse happening, you should:

  • Create a safe space for the person to tell you what is happening  
  • Assure them they will be believed
  • Keep records of any signs of abuse, including dates, times, and descriptions of incidents. This information can be vital if you need to report the situation
  • Report your concerns to the Management of the Support Provider organisation if the person is an employee or report the person to the NDIS Quality and Safeguards Commission if they are being paid directly 

Getting help for yourself

Finding out that abuse has been happening to someone in your family is a very traumatic experience and you will likely need support for you as well.

Reach out to local advocacy organisations that specialise in supporting people with disabilities and their families. They can provide you with resources, advice, and assistance as well as a person who will listen if you need someone to talk to.  

P2P provides access to information, peer support as well as a free advocacy clinic – Sunshine Coast Advocacy Clinic – Parent 2 Parent 

Reach out to providers of mental health supporters and resources.  

If you believe there is immediate danger, call 000

For non-urgent situations, you can ask for help by contacting the:

Once you have taken the initial steps to get help, the next step is to look for another support option.  This is a daunting task especially if it has taken you a long time to find the workers you have now.  

There are different options that you can try including: 

  • Advertising for independent support workers
  • Interviewing and/or changing to another Service Provider organisation – this has the benefit of there being replacement staff if one person doesn’t work out
  • Using a Support Worker hire platform e.g. Mable 

P2P Resources:

On the P2P website, you will find Easy Read Guides about keeping children safe, getting an advocate and Staying safe from abuse, neglect and exploitation.  We have more resources coming soon so keep checking back.    Easy Read Documents

Other resources are available at these links:

What to do if things go wrong? 

Disability Advocacy Finder | Ask Izzy

Domestic and family violence | Neve

When you are not ready to leave a relationship | Neve

How to be safe when you leave a relationship | Neve

ADA Law

Police Liaison Officers | QPS 

These links are for you as you seek support for the person experiencing Domestic Violence or Coercive Control

Seeking Counselling – SECCA

https://www.lifeline.org.au/get-help/ 

https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/resources-support/wellbeing/ 

Remember, no one should endure violence or be controlled by another person.  If this is happening to you, talk to someone you know that you can trust.  It could be your mum or dad, your brothers or sisters, your aunts or uncles.  Or it might be your Doctor or the people at your local Chemist.  The important thing is to get help. 

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